I became a fitness freak after being overweight for most of my childhood.

When I was overweight, I would secret eat.

I'd binge eat lots of chocolate when nobody was watching.

I’d eat away my feelings.

It was the comfort I didn't know how to give myself.

Which as you can imagine had negative effects on my confidence.

I needed food to feel good, but the more I ate the worse I’d feel and look in my body.

Uncertainty, doubt, rejection you name it.

Jaffa cakes would solve it...but only temporarily.

Fast forward a few years…

I’d lost weight.

I looked better.

I had a surface layer of confidence about me.

I say surface because I knew that if I put on a couple lbs or missed a few gym sessions I’d feel like crap again.

So my confidence was covering a lower level of anxiety of going back to who I was.

Or who I still felt I was deep down.

Which is "not good enough".

So I was scared to take a day off the gym.

I became scared and felt guilty for enjoying food.

I became miserable in a prison of my own making.

I was fighting to prove my self worth every day.

This is why so many of us subscribe to fad diets.

Fad diets have plenty of rules and restrictions.

And those rules make you feel certain about getting to the goal.

And certain about staying on track and being "good enough".

And that’s because you still don’t trust yourself.

And that's because you won't validate yourself or acknowledge your progress.

This is how people become skinny and miserable.

This is how some people lose weight but can’t keep it off.

You can’t keep something up that strips you of joy.

You end up binge eating to reward yourself.

And then over exercising to punish yourself.

This is a yo-yo diet.

I’ve learnt you can keep your mental health, energy and happiness whilst improving your physical health too!

I say all this to say that fitness can become an addiction like any other.

Yes, the good part is that at least you are exercising and eating less.

But the bad part is that many fads, coaches, and celebrities will happily enable you to become obsessive about every calorie and workout if it means a good testimonial or subscription to their programme.

Where is the healthy balance?

Fortunately, in the last couple years I have reached a happy place with my body, nutrition and discipline as a whole.

I might not look the best I ever have, but I FEEL the best I ever have.

Here’s what I’ve been teaching my clients from it…

1. It’s just as important to plan fun and rest as well as planning work and workouts. These to polar extremes complement each other. You are doing your mind, family, career and body a disservice by not resting and recovering. Because you will turn up with low energy and enthusiasm to work and responsibilities.
2. Realising that there is no such thing as a “healthy” food, helps us realise there’s no such thing as a “bad” food either. Which takes away the "should’s" and "have to’s" in dieting. Your health and your diet is a big picture. 1 meal won’t make you healthy and 1 meal won’t make you unhealthy.
3. The 80-20 rule will save you! 80% of your diet should be health conscious and driven towards your goal. 20% Of it is relaxed and based around flexibility and enjoyment.
4. The less fear you associate with health and fitness the more you will enjoy it. And for you to enjoy it you need a flexible framework not a rigid one. Rigid frameworks are intermittent fasting, no carbs or slimming world. Flexible frameworks have bandwidth, a grey area where you have wiggle room to hit your targets but also move the framework around your life.

When we have a healthy relationship with something it means we don’t fear or put it on a pedestal.

A big part of my coaching is educating my clients whilst getting them fit.

So, they realise, more workouts aren’t always better.

Less calories doesn’t mean more progress.

Punishing yourself in the process doesn’t lead to a happy destination.

And when this sinks in for you you’ll learn to relax and enjoy the process. Which then leads to way better results than you can imagine.

Are you next to make a transformation inside and out?